Bah Humbug!!! I just can't seem to get into the spirit of the season this year. I'm such a horrible mom, we don't even have our tree up yet! I've promised the kids that it will be up in the next day or two, but in my head I'm thinking "What's the point? Why put a tree up for a whole 5 days?" Then I have to remind myself that it's not about me, it's about the kids. The thing is, in years past, I was just as excited as the kids (maybe more) to get the decorations up and start the holiday fun. This year I just can't get out of my funk. I listen to carols on the radio in the car, and don't even feel like singing along much.
I know most of my problem is that I'm really missing my Dad. Then add to that all of life's regular stresses, financial woes etc. and you've got a bad combination. Mornings like today, when I feel completely overwhelmed by emotion, I stand sobbing in the shower and wonder how I'll ever be able to get through this dreaded holiday. DREADED HOLIDAY! I actually thought that! I have always loved Christmas. What is wrong with me!?
So yes, this post is turning out to be much like my Halloween post. Sorry to be such a huge bummer.
On a side note (though not entirely), I am in love with this song by Sarah McLachlan (originally sung by Joni Mitchell). This year I understand just how nice it really would be to have a river that I could skate away on.
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3 comments:
Hi Jami, I totally know what you mean. IT's hard to believe that Christmas is next Thursday! I haven't even been in the mood to go shoppig. Just remember that your Dad wouldn't want you to feel bad.
Check out my facebook, I put some cute pictues of my cousins dog on there.
Cheer up cheer up cheer up!!!
Amy
Jami,
I can totally relate to how you feel. Christmas is hard for me since both of my parents died. Sometimes it's so hard to put on a happy face for my kids, but I don't want them to grow up with memories of me always be sad on Christmas. Hang in there! Call me if you need to talk! :)
I'm so sorry! I wish I were there to help you out. My only advice is...just get the tree up. It will be one less thing to worry and feel guilty about. Don't even put everything on it. Just a few things...maybe everyone can put on 10 things. Then...done.
You can do it! Go Jami!!!
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